Going through a pile of old stuff, I found a songbook that belonged to my great-grandmother. Not sure how she got it in the first place, but the very first song it lists is Jose Alfredo Jimenez’s, Ella. Now, to me, Mr. Jimenez is among the greatest songwriters of all time and I have been listening to his music for years. My dad loved Jose Alfredo. When my jefito completed boot camp, his unit went and saw Mr. Jimenez play a concert. Ella was among the songs that always permeated my home. But, linguistic colonization erases those memories.
I think about this song, sometimes, and attempt to play it. I often request it from Mariachi groups and, more often than not, they butcher the second verse. Not sure why, but it always irritates me. It’s a song about a man who’s lost the woman he loves and tries to drown his love in tequila. She returns and finds him severely drunk and in pain and wants to take him back out of pity. However, the stars predicted the end of their love. I always interpreted the ending lyrics to mean he died.
I don’t think it’s an accident that I found the songbook. Nor do I think it’s an accident that Ella is the very first song listed. I believe that I need to preserve both the book and the songs it contains.
It is through those songs that my relationship with reality will persist. I also suspect that it’s through those songs that my culture can survive. Linguistic colonization has all but eradicated my ancestors and their realities. Very few of my genetic relatives speak either Tewa or Spanish, which were the languages of my ancestors. I speak Spanish, but I am the exception rather than the rule.
My hometown, Santa Fe, NM, is divided. But, we express our divisions and anger are almost always in English. That’s the irony: a divided community all speaks English. Linguistic colonization is the ultimate tool of oppression, yet we remain unaware of how linguistic chauvinism is the real enemy.
Beliefs and emotions divide our communities. But in finding our own songs and stories, we can find unity within ourselves and with others. We can synthesize who we truly are with the dominant culture and find our place, together. I am doing my part, with the help of an old songbook. I will preserve my native language (Spanish) as best I can. But I will do so, fully aware that the divisions within my community are a function of those who control language. Really, we shouldn’t fear any words. We should fear the actions to which those words have led.
