It’s been a long week; luckily, i didn’t have to deal with death, so that was good. Still, needed a break and went for a bike ride on some cool mountain biking trails. I can’t say I’m the most proficient mountain biker, but I was able to blow off steam and experience a roller coaster that was free (and I didn’t even have to wait in line).
There were several points during the ride where I became lost and afraid. But thanks to a map and well-placed trail markers, I eventually found my way. During those moments when I knew I was pretty lost, I couldn’t help but feel somehow more aware of my surroundings. I was hyper-focused and did all I could to get my bearings, even though I had no idea where the trail was leading. The 8-5 world doesn’t really offer those kind of moments where, even if you know better, you start to wonder if you’ll ever make it home. But each time that I was able to find my way, i was elated and relieved. It was such a rush to make it out of a valley and find a trail marker that led to the trail back to my car.
Still, even though i was afraid at times, I still saw some cool sights and allowed myself to be amazed by my surroundings. Life should always be like that: Amazing. But the truth is that it’s not. Life can be mundane and somewhat boring, which is a big part of the reason behind developing addictions. I think we’ve lost touch with the real world because we focus far too much on the illusory world making money. I realize that we all have to pay our way, but along the way, we should also allow ourselves to see the and accept that, even if we don’t know where we’re going or even why we’re here, we should still accept that there is real beauty all around us.
If we did, I think we’d have less reason to invent things to amuse ourselves and distract us from the mundane “real world.” I totally get why addicts sometimes end up as they are: They want to experience something other than the rote routines that daily life can become. I’m a middle-aged man and i refuse to allow myself to get blinded by a world that forces us all to conform. I want truth, something real and moments in which I get to feel alive fuel me and provide me the opportunity to feel alive. I hope we all get to experience that feeling without having to further turn to substances that will further reinforce how artificial this world can be.